Tonight is one of those nights where I have been reminded that in God's perfect plan life would look very different for our family. The tears that were shed tonight by one of my boys in a perfect world would not have fallen from his eyes. I don't think the pain that my son feels in his heart was what God intended when He formed a perfect world, however this is where we find ourselves.
Our smiling Lemi had a hard time at bedtime tonight. Garrett was already asleep due to a headache and so as I tucked Lemi in I had some one on one time with him. As we talked I noticed tears forming in the corners of his eyes. I gently questioned if he was ok. He shook his head no and tears started to fall down his cheeks. He then shared with me how much he misses his family in Ethiopia. My heart broke for him. There are no words to comfort my son and so I wrapped my arms around him and cried with him.
How my heart breaks that at such a young age he has had to endure so much. The loss of family, culture and security all by the time he was 4 or 5 years old. The years of watching other children be "chosen" by a family while he waited feeling as if he wasn't wanted.
Tonight there is an ache in my heart but it is joined with thanksgiving that our son is here- He is loved, cared for, accepted and will never be alone. Praying for healing in his precious heart that only God can give- Loving the best I know how and praising God that He chose me to be Lemi's adoptive mom!